Remembering the Woman You Were Before the Hurt

She's not gone - she's just waiting to be remembered.

There comes a point in a difficult marriage when you realize you've disappeared inside someone else's life. You're functioning, you're present, but you're not you. Not the girl who once had opinions, dreams, laughter, energy, or light in her eyes. Somewhere along the way, you slowly went quiet inside.

It doesn't happen in one day. It happens through a hundred small silences. You stop sharing your thoughts because it starts a debate. You stop expressing your feelings because they get dismissed. You stop asking for what you need because it seems easier to go without. You convince yourself you're fine, until one day, you don't recognize yourself anymore.

Let's get one thing straight:

You didn't lose yourself because you were weak. You lost yourself because you were surviving.

You adjusted to keep the peace. You absorb blame to avoid conflict. You stopped being honest about your needs because it didn't feel safe to have them.

That wasn’t a failure. That was survival. But survival is not your destination.

Action Step 1: Start by telling yourself the truth again.

At least once today, pause and ask yourself: what do I truly feel right now? Without editing. Without apologizing. Without minimizing it, because someone else might not understand. Honesty with yourself is the first step toward seeing clearly again.

She's not lost, only quiet. Beneath the silence, she’s still steady, still strong, still anchored in who God created her to be - because truth is what breaks the spell of confusion.

The moment you tell yourself the truth, even privately, your inner world begins to shift. You stop agreeing with the lies that say your voice doesn't matter, and you start rebuilding your worth from the inside out.

Action Step 2: Nurture what’s still alive in you.

Do one small thing this week that brings warmth back into your spirit.

Maybe it's sipping your coffee slowly instead of rushing. Maybe it's saying no to something that drains you. Maybe it's stepping outside, breathing in the air, and remembering that you still have a life to live.

These small acts of self-respect may seem insignificant, but they restore your heart to trust yourself again. Every time you honour yourself, you whisper, I’m still here, and I still matter.

These small, sacred choices are how you begin to rebuild trust with yourself.

Healing doesn't start when everything around you changes; it begins the moment you remember your heart matters to.

Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. John 8:32 (NIV)

Still Her - The Journey Home